muscadine: (Me 2005)
[personal profile] muscadine
The way this meme works is as follows: I commented on [livejournal.com profile] bdouville's post, and he gave me the age 14. If you request in the comments, I'll assign you an age, and so the chain of memes can continue. Or not. So, here goes.


AT 14 (for reference, we're talking June 1990-91.)

I lived in:
A couple of different houses with my parents in Columbia, Tennessee. This year we moved from a rental house on 15th Street to another rental on Bigby Drive (thus "the Bigby house") - it was a bigger, nicer house with a much larger lot and in a nicer neighborhood. It also backed up to a creek which was nice to watch and listen to, although when it flooded sometimes that was a little anxiety-producing. My parents ended up having 5 different residences in Columbia, the Bigby house being the 3rd one, but we stayed at Bigby through my high school experience so even though eventually they bought a house this one probably felt the most like "home" of all the houses they had there.

I drove:
My mother up the wall? But seriously, nothing. I think I technically had a bike at that point but it was a little outdated and I preferred to walk in the neighborhood and to my school. The start of the next year I would begin learning how to drive with my stepdad's Toyota Corolla and my mom's blue station wagon (can't remember the make or model now but it might have been a Chevrolet Cavalier?).

I was in a relationship with:
Nobody. This was a period when I was pretty confused about and therefore in deep conflict/denial about my sexuality. The previous year I had had some form of brief "going together" relationship with a girl from church who was a year older. She had a crush on me and initiated with a card/note, and I thought she was nice, but we didn't go on any dates together (at least beyond "we're a bunch of youth hanging out together and the two of us are here") and I really had no clue about the whole thing - I don't think we ever even kissed. (After that I wouldn't "go out" with anyone else until senior prom.) That year was the year of emergent sexuality but it wasn't directed towards her or any other girls. So, by 14 I was clear I was attracted to other boys and I had done clandestine reading/research (of course!) to understand what was going on and had come to the conclusion I was experiencing a regular phase of sexual experimentation that many boys go through. I had crushes on some of my male friends but that's as far as things went in terms of any exploration of sexuality until a year or two later.

I feared:
Gym class. This was my last year of having to do school gym which I was very thankful for, but the last year was kind of hell. Besides the potential problems in the locker room with my nascent sexuality, I was the classic nerd - bookish, small for my age, somewhat sickly, and totally un-athletic. So there was lots of teasing and general eye-rolling by peers at my lack of ability in gym class, and I was generally one of the last picks for teams (although, thankfully, not always the very last). I do have to say some people were kind enough to genuinely try to help me perform to the best of my (low) ability, and the fellow nerds kind of hung together, but that didn't make the worst moments any better.

I worked at:
Doing well in school, mostly. I don't think my first "official" job was until the year before I graduated from high school and it was just some minor data entry, as my mom was pretty adamant that my "job" was focusing on and excelling at my schoolwork. That being said, as I got into my teenage years I did do some "family business" work over the summers on my bio-dad's farm and if I'm not mistaken the summer at the end of this year was my first year to really go out in the fields and do serious labor.

I wanted to be:
A veterinarian. From as far back as I (or anybody else) can remember I always wanted to do something related to the sciences, and around this year this started to get specifically focused towards serious thoughts about a career and the implications of particular career choices. I begain to get interested in medicine and in particular at this point I was thinking I wanted to be a veterinarian. I did some Explorer's Club activities this year that eventually convinced me that I didn't want to be a vet after all and by the following year I was considering human medicine. That interest would stick through college and into medical school, although obviously I did finally change my mind.

Date: 2015-10-13 04:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] queerbychoice.livejournal.com
I'll take an age. What age would you like to know what I was like at?

Date: 2015-10-13 11:05 am (UTC)

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